10 Most Stupid Questions!

March 28, 2007 at 1:29 pm (Uncategorized)

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People usually ask obvious situations and some equally stupid answers for
those:

1.At the movies: When you meet acquaintances/friends…
Stupid Question: Hey, what are you doing here?
Answer: Don’t u know I sell tickets in black over here.

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on
your feet…
Stupid Question: Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer: No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia. Why don’t you try
again?

3. At a funeral: One of the teary eyed people ask…
Stupid Question: Why, why him, of all people.
Answer: Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter
Stupid Question: Is the “Paneer Butter Masala” dish good?
Answer: No, it’s terrible and made of adulterated cement. We
occasionally also spit on it.

5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years.
Stupid Question: Munna, Chickoo, you’ve become so big.
Answer: Well you haven’t particularly shrunk yourself.

6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask…
Stupid Question: Is the guy you’re marrying well?
Answer: No, he’s a miserable wife beating, insensitive lout…it’s
just the money.

7. When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call…
Stupid Question: Sorry. Were you sleeping?
Answer: No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. And you thought I was sleeping…. You dumb witted moron.

8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair…
Stupid Question: Hey have you had a haircut?
Answer: No, its autumn and I’m shedding.

9. At the dentist when he’s sticking pointed objects in your mouth…
Stupid Question: Tell me if it hurts?
Answer: No it won’t. It will just bleed.

10. You are smoking a cigarette and a cute woman asks…
Stupid Question: Oh, so you smoke.
Answer: Gosh, it’s a miracle ……………………it was a piece of chalk and now it’s in flames!

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Want a girl friend from Male’?

March 28, 2007 at 1:15 pm (Fun Stuff)

I just thought about why i have not had a girl friend after i came back to male’ and here is the answer for the little research i did.

These are the 3 things you should probably have if you want a girl friend in Male’

1. A Phone - To call her every now and then. To set the date or arrange the place of the date. To be on time. To be there for her when ever she is in need. Send text messages picture messages to her. To take pictures of both of you together (or her pictures mostly) To play music when she feels bored. Send her credit if she’s got a pre-paid from your post paid.

2. A Vehicle – A motor cycle. Or a car is more preferable. To take her to the office and bring her home. To take her for a coffee or a dinner. To take her for a ride late at night. Roam around male for two to three times on Bodu Thakurufaanu Magu. Basically to be her taxi driver.

3. Money – Obviously one of the most important thing you got to have if you want a girl friend here in Male’. To impress her and make her go out with you. To buy her presents on birthdays anniversaries and other special occasions. To pay for the coffee, the lunch or the dinner. To pay for the holiday trip to a resort or a foreign country. All in all money will be a part of everything you do with her.

You might survive with a girl friend if you have one or two things mentioned above. But if you do not have any of these three things mentioned above, don’t even dream about having a girl friend here in Male’……!!!! OR WAIT… until their mind evolve to want something you’ve got. (might be something sane next time)

So its like….

Before
Social respect, higher social ranking, high class people like “beyfulhun” “ganduvaru therey saahibun” “fandithaverin” “valeeverin” and “all those shit” Or people who have houses, a fishing boat or people who have a lot of coconut palms maybe.

Now
A car or a motor cycle. An expensive phone. A lot of money.

Later
Maybe more educated people. Degree holders. Phd holders. Professionals. Creative people. Intellectual people. Innovative people. People with a better understanding and a higher IQ level. Or might it not be the chance for a free thinker like me?

source: bb’s blog

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Virus from Weird Al!

March 27, 2007 at 7:00 pm (Fun Stuff)

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WTF??!

March 27, 2007 at 6:46 pm (Fun Stuff)

wtf

what the fuck? :o

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A smelly e-mail

March 27, 2007 at 6:45 pm (Fun Stuff, Hacks, Hardware)

Sniffing the scent of the ocean while booking a vacation online or the smell of whisky and cigars while digitally listening to jazz. The British cable company Telewest adds a whole new dimension to internet: Smell!

The technology makes it possible to send and receive a large number of odours through e-mail. The user has to attach a special scent device to his computer. This device contains 20 aromas that, while mixed properly, can produce about sixty scents.
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The sender will have to send a code along with the e-mail to attach a special odour to it. The scent divice translates this code into a special smell that will be spread all around the computer.

Think about it! The scent of fresh bread while doing your online shopping or a relaxing aromatherapy.

The scent device can easily be connected through on of your serial ports on your computer. The hardware can be bought for the price of 250 British pounds.

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Teacher asks students to masturbate

March 27, 2007 at 6:39 pm (Uncategorized)

A biology teacher in Brazil is being sued for asking students to masturbate for a class project.

The teacher asked three teenagers to provide sperm samples (in other words: masturbate) so the class could study sperm under the microscope.

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One of the students told his parents about the incident. His shocked parents immediately notified the police.

A spokesman for the police said: “It is a disrespectful and bizarre thing to ask a student, we are all horrified.”

The school, located in Campo Grande, Rio de Janeiro, says it’s equally appalled by the biology teacher’s behaviour.

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See what smoking does to you!???

March 27, 2007 at 6:38 pm (Uncategorized)

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this might happen to you if you dont stop smoking :P

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Carmen Electra for sale on Ebay!

March 27, 2007 at 6:36 pm (Fun Stuff, celebrities, news)

A date with former Baywatch star Carmen Electra is being auctioned off on Ebay for charity.

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he ex-Baywatch actress is up for sale to help raise money for The National Prostate Cancer Coalition.

So far there have been 88 bids and the highest bid currently is at US $20,600.00 (Bidding closes on Saturday, 7 May 2005).

The auction’s rules state only males aged between 15 and 20 are eligible to go on the night out with the sexy pin-up.

The lucky winner gets one night with Carmen, but has to hand her back to rock star husband Dave Navarro at the end.

Look for more details about the date on Ebay.

Update: The date has been sold for US $407,500.00

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Bangladesh Put India Out

March 27, 2007 at 6:26 pm (news, sports)

 Bangladesh Put India Out

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Bangladesh beat Bermuda by seven wickets in a rain-affected match in World Cup Group B to claim the last place in the Super Eight.

Bermuda were restricted to 94 for nine from 21 overs in between four rain interruptions and Bangladesh were required to score 96 from their 21 overs on the Duckworth-Lewis system.

Bermuda gave a spirited performance, reducing Bangladesh to 37 for three, but Saqibul Hasan (26no) and Mohammad Ashraful (29no) added 59 off 62 balls in an unbroken fourth-wicket partnership to see their team to victory.

They came together after Bangladesh had lost Tamin Iqbal, Shahriar Nafees and Aftab Ahmed, all to the medium pace of Saleem Mukuddem (3 for 19) but any thoughts Bermuda had of recording their first World Cup victory evaporated as the pair settled.

The game started 90 minutes late because of rain and was interrupted after only three overs for another 40 minutes. There were two other interruptions during the Bermuda innings.

Bangladesh skipper Habibul Bashar won the toss and opted to field and when play finally started the game was reduced to 41 overs.

But after three overs, play was halted with Bermuda six for one. They lost their first wicket with the final ball of the opening over, when Stephen Outerbridge was caught at fine leg by Mohammad Rafique without scoring.

Play resumed after a break of 51 minutes and the contest was further reduced to 35 overs.

Bermuda lost two further wickets before rain chased the players off the field after 7.4 overs.

Delyone Borden (two) was caught by Bashar off Mashrafe Mortaza with the total on eight and three runs later the experienced David Hemp (0) was caught by Aftab Ahmed of left-arm seamer Syed Rasel.

The third interruption came with Bermuda 19 for three after eight overs and they were 45 for four after 15.1 overs when the fourth suspension came.

When play resumed umpires Steve Davis and Ian Powell ruled that it was a 21-over affair.

Left with 5.5 overs, the Bermuda batsmen found it hard to adjust and apart from Dean Minors – who hit 23 runs from 25 balls, including a six in the last over – none of the others responded to the situation.

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Pakistan Not Nervous

March 27, 2007 at 6:24 pm (news, sports)

 Pakistan Not Nervous

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Pakistan’s players have no reasons to fear a return home, according to team spokesman Pervez Mir.

The squad finally left their Heathrow hotel, which has been their base for the last couple of days since their return from the World Cup in the Caribbean, to make the journey back to Pakistan.

Since their surprise exit from the tournament and the even more shocking murder of coach Bob Woolmer in his Jamaican hotel room, emotions have been running high in Pakistan.

However, Mir said the players had nothing to fear when they touch down in their homeland.

“Pakistan are a very proud nation, they respect their players but tempers do sometimes flare,” he said.

“People are disappointed and there are always certain people who are a bit over the top but I’m sure the PCB [Pakistan Cricket Board] have made all the necessary arrangements for the players and there is no reason for concern, especially when you go back to your own country.

“When you go home, you are never nervous but, of course, there is that disappointment. But let’s look forward to the future and future victory. I’ve always said we don’t have a copyright on winning games.”

Mir also dismissed suggestions any Pakistan players were suspects in the Woolmer murder inquiry.

“I would say that the Pakistani team was never a suspect. We had nothing to do with it,” he added.

“We were part of the same inquiry as everybody else so of course we were questioned.”

He said it was “absolutely absurd” to say Woolmer had argued with members of the team, including captain Inzamam-ul-Haq, before his death.

“There were a lot of rumours that I had rowed with Inzamam and that was a joke,” Mir added.

“But at least I was here, thank God, to answer those questions. Mr Woolmer is not here,.

“He was a very good man, a good coach and a father figure. Let’s remember him for all those things rather than tarnish his memory.”

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